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Kentucky Derby: Root for the Horse With No Balls

Comma To The Top is the people's champion

By Kevin Spak,  Newser Staff

Posted May 6, 2011 1:30 PM CDT

(Newser) – Looking for a rooting interest at Sunday’s Kentucky Derby? Well, you should be cheering for Comma To The Top, argues Edward McClelland of Slate, for one simple reason: "He can’t produce sperm." Which means he’ll be able to race for another three years. “If early favorite Dialed In wins, he’ll retire at the end of the summer, and follow in the hoofprints of 2010 winner Super Saver, who is currently servicing mares for $20,000 a spasm.”

“I’m telling you this so you’ll understand what you’re watching Saturday,” McClelland writes. “The Kentucky Derby is a sperm pageant.” Winning increases stallions' stud fees so much that they invariably retire instantly. “The most exciting two minutes in sports is just a prelude to an even more exciting two minutes (or less) on a bluegrass country farm.” Not so for Comma To The Top. He’ll “experience that kind of excitement only on the racetrack. But we’ll get to experience it with him, for years to come.”

Jockey Corey Nakatani celebrates after Comma To The Top's win at the Grade I, $750,000 CashCall Futurity horse race Saturday, Dec. 18, 2010, at Hollywood Park in Inglewood, Calif.
Jockey Corey Nakatani celebrates after Comma To The Top's win at the Grade I, $750,000 CashCall Futurity horse race Saturday, Dec. 18, 2010, at Hollywood Park in Inglewood, Calif.   (AP Photo/Benoit Photo)
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These horses aren't running to become the sport's greatest champion. They're running to become the breeding industry's highest priced lover. - Edward McClelland

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COMMENTS
Showing 3 of 4 comments
Disillusioned
May 8, 2011 5:54 AM CDT
Most ignorant so called sports "news" ever written Looks like someone never heard the word Gelding and yes, that is a castrated male horse It is done for many reasons, it gives the horse a healthier life, makes the horse more manageable if they have a mean streak and are hard to ride, mean horses wind up in glue factories or worse Learn about horses before posting b/s news stories slanting views on a subject you are totally ignorant about. The closest you seem to have been to a horse was a merry go round
schmidtkoff
May 6, 2011 7:57 PM CDT
well, if you got a dog with a pedigree then you have a stud or a bitch with the potential to produce future generations of winners. if you own a purebred horse then he has the potential to produce future winners as a stallion. he has balls and testosterone and thus produces sperm to propagate his genetic muscle. so as to speak. if comma can't produce sperm then he cannot be a contender. plain and simple. he is barren. he has no future in producing offspring. thus he should be ineligible to compete, to run in the derby.
AmandaT
May 6, 2011 6:49 PM CDT
The Derby is on Saturday. Way to check your facts.
 

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