Drunk Man Punches Self to Fake Assault Daniel Vagnini also threw his wallet, keys into the river By Newser Editors and Wire Services Posted Jun 7, 2011 9:36 AM CDT 1 comment Comments Faking assault on oneself is probably one of those ideas that seems awesome ... while drunk. (Shutterstock) (Newser) – A Connecticut man punched himself in the face, tore his shirt, and threw his wallet and keys in a river to convince police he had been assaulted. Daniel Vagnini was arrested after reporting that he has been assaulted, then admitting he made up the story. Police say Vagnini sped through a stop sign and nearly crashed into a car. Police later found his car and heard Vagnini in the woods. The 22-year-old told police he had been drinking in Hartford, was assaulted, and blacked out ... the drinking part was apparently true. He was charged with reckless driving, evading responsibility, and driving under the influence.