So many life lessons in this one: Police in suburban Chicago say a 14-year-old boy who was home alone arranged online for a prostitute to visit. She arrived, told the boy to take off his pants, then doused him with pepper spray, reports the Tribune. The woman took the teen's iPad and—in the detail that elevates this police blotter item to the top of the heap—his piggy bank. The boy called the cops, who tracked down their suspect at a nearby motel when—in a life lesson for her, too—she turned on the iPad. The 22-year-old is being held on charges of armed robbery. And the 14-year-old has his piggy bank back.