Dennis Rodman is pretty pleased with himself and the important work he did over in North Korea. So pleased, in fact, that he offers up this amazing quote to Sports Illustrated:
- "My mission is to break the ice between hostile countries. Why it’s been left to me to smooth things over, I don’t know. Dennis Rodman, of all people. Keeping us safe is really not my job; it’s the black guy’s [Obama's] job. But I’ll tell you this: If I don’t finish in the top three for the next Nobel Peace Prize, something’s seriously wrong."
Er, there are just a few teensy problems with that plan, like the fact that the Nobel nomination period ended on February 1, and that you can't nominate yourself. But rather than dwell on that, let's consider the rest of Rodman's interview:
- On his knowledge of North Korea: "Before I landed in Pyongyang, I didn’t know Kim Jong Un from Lil’ Kim. I didn’t know what country he ruled or what went on in the country he ruled."
- On why Kim is not so bad: "Fact is, he hasn’t bombed anywhere he’s threatened to yet. Not South Korea, not Hawaii, not … whatever. People say he’s the worst guy in the world. All I know is Kim told me he doesn’t want to go to war with America. His whole deal is to talk basketball with Obama."
- On his plan to return to North Korea next month: "I’m just gonna chill, play some basketball, and maybe go on vacation with Kim and his family. I’ve called on the Supreme Leader to do me a solid by releasing Kenneth Bae."