If you've got a federal crime to commit, the FBI will soon have a few dates to recommend.* In the latest fallout from the budget sequester, the FBI has decided to close its headquarters and all of its offices on 10 weekdays over the next year, sources tell the New York Times. The FBI believes it's the simplest and most effective way to furlough its employees, who represent 60% of the bureau's budget, and collectively cost $16 million a day.
The dates haven't been announced yet, but many will probably fall around holidays like Christmas and Thanksgiving that many workers would have taken off anyway, and they'll all generate long weekends. And our opening gag to the contrary, officials insist criminals won't have carte blanche on furlough days; there will be a plan in place to mobilize agents in case of things like terrorist attacks or kidnappings.
* Newser LLC does not actually advocate criminal activity on any date, and suspects the FBI would just catch you when they got back to work, anyway.