What's a newly divorced Russian strongman to do when most of the world wants to throttle him and he's getting no respect from his own supporters? Play a little hockey, that's what. And pretty badly, reports the Week in a look at Vladimir Putin's foray onto the ice yesterday at something called the "All-Russia Festival of Amateur Teams of the Night Hockey League" in Sochi. Even with a less-than-motivated opposition goalie and near-assists from NHL players, Putin choked several times. Yet somehow, reports the Daily Mail via the Voice of Russia, Putin managed to score six times and had five assists. Despite his, er, heroics, Putin's team eventually lost, but no hard feelings, says the president: "There are no winners or losers here. This is a friendly game." Click for the Week's GIF of Putin attempting to put his helmet on—backward.