Would-Be Truck Thief Grabs Bag— of Dog Poop

It's a small consolation for a Des Moines man who woke to find that somebody had broken into his truck and messed with the steering column in a failed attempt to steal the vehicle. Police say the would-be thief then rummaged around the bed of the truck and made off with precisely one thing—"a bag of dog feces," reports the Des Moines Register. This was presumably a nasty surprise later when the bag was opened, one that still amounts to third-degree burglary charges if the person is caught. The newspaper's last line is priceless: "The dog feces was valued at $1." (More weird crimes stories.)