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December 3, 2008 1:58:37 AM CST

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'Do-It-Yourself' Can Be Fightin' Words

Posted May 4, 08 12:18 PM CDT in Arts & Living 

(Newser) – Adrian starts painting in the middle, but Hannah wants the wall layered methodically. Adrian storms out, and Hannah works alone. The DIY dispute is no anomaly: 35% of British homeowners said in a recent study that home improvements caused domestic rifts. Underlying the debates on paint color and floorboards is a power struggle, marital therapist Andrew G. Marshall writes in the Times of London.

Unlike money or sex issues, half-finished projects constantly remind couples of their disagreement. The bickering can be a sign of passive-aggressive or controlling behavior, but before you call a professional to finish the job, try working through it. Marshall writes that DIY projects offer a chance to practice finding solutions. Focus on each other’s positives, try compromising, and when all else fails, divvy up the work.

Source Times (UK)

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Couples said they clashed on differing ways of operating in DIY projects: Leaving tools around or taking longer than the other person wants led to fights.   (Shutter stock)
35% of British couples admit to fighting because of home improvement projects.   (Shutter stock)
Working on project together can help couples learn to solve disputes, compromise, and divide up work fairly, a marital therapist suggests.   (Shutter Stock)
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marriage • psychology • relationship • fight • therapy • couples • home improvement


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