R. Kelly's jury is complete, and the arduous process of getting it filled contains a lesson: Should you ever be called upon to weigh in at a child pornography trial, the Chicago Tribune offers some proven ways—at least they worked in this case— to avoid getting trapped in the jury box:
- Mention your teenage daughter.
- Argue the age of consent is too high.
- Explain that you're a doctor with lives to save.
- Stutter when asked if you can give Kelly a fair trial.
- Say you're a cop.
- Sing Kelly's praises.
- Look too eager to serve in a tabloid trial.
- Have a lawyer coach you on all the wrong answers.
- Fret about your wedding plans.
- Sue or get sued.
- Have your mother claim you're mentally ill.
- Blame Kelly for 9/11.