Paris' Slammer Grub Beats Its Bum Rap

4 hospitalized with stab wounds; cause unknown

(NEWSER) - Some 200 inmates rioted at San Quentin prison last night, leaving at least four hospitalized with stab and slash wounds. Others suffered minor injuries. Guards, who fired non-lethal bullets and pepper spray to halt the violence, found at least 10 inmate-made weapons afterward. The cause of the fight, which occurred in the California prison's dining hall, remains unclear, the AP reports. The Marin Independent Journal notes that "various ethnic groups were involved." More»

But only to avoid 'disruptions' at jail

(NEWSER) - You better believe Paris Hilton got special treatment after she was arrested on suspicion of cocaine possession. "Yeah, she was treated differently so I don't have a disruption of my process here at the county jail," says the jailer who rushed Hilton through the booking process in three hours—half the average time. "When you bring somebody in like that, everybody comes over and tries to look at them. I'd have officers attempting to keep inmates away from her. I'd have disruptions." More»

Actress begins 90-day sentence tomorrow

(NEWSER) - Lindsay Lohan starts her 90-day sentence for a probation violation tomorrow, and the Tinseltown trainwreck is a "nervous, fidgety mess," a source tells People . "All weekend, Lindsay kept crying, chain smoking and chewing her nails." Another alleged friend says, "She's been picturing herself in jail and she can't handle the idea of it." She may not have much time to get her head around it, either—there's a good chance she won't have to serve more than 25% of her sentence, reports the AP . More»

Plea deal will get actor out in time to film sitcom

(NEWSER) - Charlie Sheen will reportedly go to jail after a plea bargain reducing a felony charge stemming from his Christmas Day brouhaha with wife Brooke Mueller to a misdemeanor. "Charlie intends to go to court on June 7, plead to a misdemeanor, and immediately begin serving his 30 days," a source tells People . "With good behavior, he could end up doing 15 or so days." Don't worry, Two and a Half Men fans: Sheen's plea deal gets him out of the slammer before filming begins in August. More»

Simpson is still king as far as some inmates are concerned

(NEWSER) - The National Enquirer has outdone itself with its story on OJ Simpson and his band of gay inmate buddies. Highlights from the article:

• Most disturbing detail: OJ—who is “still a somebody” inside the prison walls, says a former fellow inmate—gets massages from gay inmates known as “The Girls.”
• Best juicy tabloid lines: OJ, aka “king of the queens,” is “treated like royalty by his gay posse!”