So, Your Wife's a Porn Star?
Domestic bliss abounds, as long as you don't ask about the office
By Paul Stinson, Newser User
Posted Aug 12, 2008 11:55 AM CDT
Mikayla Mendez poses with fellow adult industry actresses during a convention in Las Vegas.    (Flickr )

(Newser) – Married life with a porn star has its downsides, husbands admit: Wives can talk about the day at work, appear odd to soccer mom friends, or even suffer the occasional vaginal tear on the job. Or, says Bill—husband to Ryder Skye—you can lie around thinking of how she makes a living. But "I want her to be happy," he tells GQ. "On the downside, though, there are guys having sex with your wife."

Ryan Brown, fiance to Kelly Skyline, recalls a text she sent him: "I've been ripped." He knew the drill: Prepare for a sexless few days and set up an Epsom-salt bath. But married-in-porn has its upsides too, like threesomes with her colleagues and other kinky adventures. Charmane Star's boyfriend says she's the sanest girl he's met in Hollywood: "My attitude is that if you can find a cool girl ... good for you."

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JM1047
Oct 25, 2010 12:25 AM CDT
Although this article states that marriage to a porn-star has its ups and downs, this article was written by someone who has never lived or experienced what they have put on paper. A porn-star or even former porn-star is still a person. I am married to a former porn-star, and although she has given up a vast majority of her career, her porn past still haunts us both from time to time. I believe that it haunts her more than it does me however. There are many times when I can tell she genuinely regrets the decisions she made in the past, if for no other reason than how it affects me from time to time. I have never judged her on her past, and although I did not know the full extent of it until after we were engaged, I married her anyway and deal with my own private demons. The biggest thing that you are going to have to deal with as a porn-star (or former porn-star) husband is the aftermath of her past. If she is still in the business, it will likely cause issues for you and your wife. No healthy relationship will ever include spouses having sex with other people... even if it is only in front of a camera for a paycheck. If you are going to work long term, either join her in her career as a permanent partner (yes it might limit her career a bit) or help her find a new career. Help put her through college, find a job that suits her, or do whatever you two decide to do but the longer she continues her career with other men/women the more long term damage it will cause. No matter what you do gentlemen, do NOT ask her to give up her career if you cannot/will not/ do not plan to support her either while she finds another line of work (which may be tough) or forever. It simply isn't fair to her. Now how things will impact you: It doesn't matter if she does or did hardcore with men or women, solo with toys, or even "playboy" style modeling you WILL be judged based on your wife's current or former career. You may not be jealous of her past with other men (I am not) but you will have it thrown in your face should someone discover her past. You also have to deal with fan backlash, as after a porn-star settles into a truly loving relationship she will likely quit the business. Fan's do not like it when their favorite fantasies go away, and if you are linked on any social media you will likely receive hate mail and will be hounded by these individuals. (Trust me... it happened to yours truly) Gent's I have saved the best for last... the Internet. Your wife's past will be on the net for everyone to see. Forever. It will NOT go away, and she will always be the object of someone's sexual satisfaction. It is just something that you will have to deal with. There is no getting away from it and to be honest you will have to accept it or move on. There is no other way. So in closing: You WILL be harassed because of her celluloid past. She WILL always feel guilty for this. You WILL always have to deal with fans and their comments should they find your wife. You WILL have to deal with sexual images of her gratifying the masses. Does this mean that I don't think you should stay together or avoid a relationship altogether? The answer to that actually falls on you. If you love this woman, nothing else matters. Eventually her past will fade from public memory (although it will never disappear) and if YOU are adult enough to accept her for who and what she is, was, and will be your relationship will be fine. If you are immature and cannot handle a comment or two it is best to just part ways and find someone that you can be happy with as she will eventually find a man who doesn't care about her past and see her for the person that she is. Good luck J.M.
vinaymunda
Feb 21, 2010 12:20 AM CST
Married life with a Pornstar has its own pleasure..!