Steak: More Than Meats the Eye

From 'grilled to perfection' to 'garden fresh'

(NEWSER) - Tired of menus that use the same old phrases over and over? So are the food critics at the Chicago Tribune. They nominated nine menu clichés for the compost pile:

• "Grilled to perfection": Subjective to the point of meaninglessness. And why always grilled, and not “boiled” or “baked”? Can only grilling reach perfection?
• "World famous": Almost always an empty boast.
• "Kobe burger": “Kobe” is becoming a general synonym for “high quality”; it doesn't apply unless the beef actually came from Japan.

Scribe's first steak in 22 years 'absolutely delicious'—until brain, stomach revolt

(NEWSER) - The embarrassment for a cow in being a meal for a human one-fifth its size is among the reasons AJ Jacobs doesn’t eat meat. “If my body ended up as brunch for some badger or dachshund, I know I'd be pissed,” he writes in Esquire. But that wasn’t enough for carnivorous colleagues, who took him to Brooklyn’s premier steakhouse in a conversion effort. More»

Sporks, wine stoppers serve no discernible purpose

(NEWSER) - Have you ever truly benefited from a spork? Do you face a pressing need to bake muffin tops, not actual muffins? The Daily Meal rounds up the most useless food-related inventions:

• Quesadilla maker: Don’t you already have a pan?
• Spork: Use a fork or use a spoon. End of story.

Things you really need to know about penis jokes and shoes

(NEWSER) - Esquire celebrates all things female in its cleverly named "Women" issue, and it tries to do right by the ladies of the world by telling men all the things they're doing wrong. Straight from the mouth of the fairer species, Esquire collected 1,000 tips—and shares a select 100:

• No. 10: Roses are cliche. When in doubt, go with a bouquet of lilies.
• No. 51: Joking to us about your penis size makes us uncomfortable. Every single time.
• No. 109: "Hey, you awake?" is not a form of foreplay.

(NEWSER) - If an industry group's cooking competition is any indication, the Wall Street Journal reports, hospital food ain’t what it used to be. This year's winner of the National Society for Healthcare Foodservice Management's gold medal produced a “Machaca Flat Iron Steak” that met with his hospital nutritionist’s approval and cost less than $5 to make. “Chefs in health care are the most misunderstood people,” a former champ says. More»