Like Wall Street and Detroit, Hollywood is sinking under stagnant numbers and outdated business plans. The Los Angeles Times runs down some Tinseltown properties in need of a bailout.
- MTV: The once counter-culture juggernaut should take a hint and develop edgy new dramas a la Gossip Girl.
- Law and Order: Old, tired, and indistinguishable, the show needs to consolidate.
- Jennifer Aniston: That "unlucky-in-love image" isn't working; why not date a regular joe and do a play?
- 90210: If you can't get Luke Perry back, maybe it's just time to call it quits. Just ask the show's viewers.
- The Oscars: It's pretty simple, really: nominate blockbusters and viewership skyrockets. So next year, it's Iron Man and Twilight for Best Picture.
- Paris Hilton: The heiress seems to already have bailed herself out of frivolity with her Presidential run.
- Heroes: Take all that aimless energy and make the show a musical.
For the complete list, click the link below.