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I Hate Facebook; You Should Too

By Harry Kimball, Newser Staff

Posted Mar 9, 2009 6:58 PM CDT

(Newser) – Facebook is a soul-sucking enterprise that can steal away your dependable wife and connect you with people you'd rather avoid—or happily forget, Matt Labash writes in the Weekly Standard. Users of the “stultifying” and “mind-numbing” site have “a reality-show star's unquenchable thirst for broadcasting all the details of their lives, no matter how unexceptional.”

“They do so,” Labash continues, “in the steady, Chinese-water-torture drip of status updates.” Those who develop an immunity—like Labash’s wife, who mercifully gave up her obsession—invariably look back on the dalliance in horror. Labash prefers email, where he indulges in "rivalry, and thinly veiled insults, and petty jealousies and imagined slights. Who needs Facebook friends? That's what real friends are for."

[Images (2)]

[Quotes (2)]

Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg. (AP Photo)

A Facebook page. (AP Photo)

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Time magazine recently declared Facebook more popular than porn. But who are they kidding? Facebook is porn. - Matt Labash, Weekly Standard

She had a new slackness to her. She was now filling out the endless Facebook busy-work questionnaires people constantly send to each other like dippy substitute teachers.
- Matt Labash, on his wife

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COMMENTS

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Showing 3 of 13 comments

Guest

Jul 12, 2009 3:27 AM CDT

I think all who use facebook are a bunch of sad no hopers ,who should get a life and not worry bout how many so called friends "they all brag about" Christ even grannys are on the bloody thing....i think the so called genius who invented it should be flogged in public for turning civilized peoples brains in to mush!!! All i hear from pals is..."go on join up its great fun...i can talk to u online!!!!" huh!!! if i wanted to talk to u i would use that other genius of the modern age...callled a phone or even a text!!....christ getover ur selves u morons!!!

BlahBlahBlah

Mar 11, 2009 4:21 AM CDT

SOMEONE SAID IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT ABOUT TIME!!!!

Guest

Mar 10, 2009 8:58 PM CDT

here, here!

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