Snappy newsletters. Simple Facebook sharing. Spirited comments. Sweet features are waiting… GET THEM NOW!

Hipsters, Please: Stop With the Rattails

Ugly 'do could lead to the downfall of America

By Evann Gastaldo,  Newser Staff

Posted Sep 25, 2009 9:57 AM CDT

(Newser) – There’s a new generation of hipsters “and, if you can believe it, they're sporting something even more disgusting than von Dutch fashions: a rattail,” writes Andrew Belonsky for Gawker. Think it’s no more than an ill-informed fashion decision, “the hairstyle of choice for rednecks and unwashed losers”? Think again: “It must stop! Rattails are a threat to America—and not just for the negative aesthetic value.”

America is, after all, “an international beacon”—and rattails “make the country look weak and hickish. And weak, hickish countries get invaded,” Belonsky continues. “So, if America falls, it's your fault, bedraggled, so-called ironic hipster. If you ever cared about this once great nation, get a real haircut and stop embarrassing your parents—and the rest of us.”

It was once cool to hate on all of the upper-class lowlifes who appropriate white trash style, but that set has been neutralized by babies and real jobs. But there's a new crop. And they're worse!
"It was once cool to hate on all of the upper-class lowlifes who appropriate white trash style, but that set has been neutralized by babies and real jobs. But there's a new crop. And they're worse!"   (©post406)
Once the hairstyle of choice for rednecks and unwashed losers, the rattail has found new life in New York City's cheaper boroughs.
"Once the hairstyle of choice for rednecks and unwashed losers, the rattail has found new life in New York City's cheaper boroughs."   (©rainasun)
« Prev« Prev | Next »Next » Slideshow
To report an error on this story, notify our editors.
A snapshot of the day's best news stories.
 
COMMENTS
Showing 3 of 23 comments
OldFart
Sep 26, 2009 11:45 AM CDT
I'm back. Just had to straighten out and comb ...
OldFart
Sep 26, 2009 11:13 AM CDT
Oops!
WallyEFunk
Sep 25, 2009 10:56 AM CDT
You have gotten that right.

More Newser Stories

The 9-to-5 Workday Could Soon Punch Out

Mitt Romney's Barber Wants Him to Loosen Up

Cassette Tapes Are Back

Forget Planking, Owling: 'Horsemaning' Is Here

Forget Planking, Try Owling


NEWS FROM OUR PARTNERS
Other Sites We Like:   24/7 Wall St.   |   Betty Confidential   |   BuzzFeed   |   Cracked   |   Fark   |   Timelines   |   The Frisky   |   Geek Sugar   |   NewsOne