Tiger Woods' Sexy Texts Revealed

Teaching today’s lesson on why it’s not a good idea to send sexy text messages to your mistress: Tiger Woods. In Touch got hold of texts and emails to galpals Rachel Uchitel and Jaimee Grubbs, and here are a few of the best, courtesy of the New York Daily News and the New York Post:

• To Uchitel: "I know it's brutal on you that you can't be with me all the time. I get it. It f---ing kills me, too."

• To Uchitel: "I finally found someone I connect with, someone I have never found like this. Not even at home. You want someone to witness your life."
• To Uchitel: "I want you to lay next to me, lay on me or where ever you want to lay. f---. Why didn't we find each other years ago. We wouldn't be having this conversation."
• From Grubbs: She mentions a sexy "new piercing," calls golf "boring," says Woods is "my first, last and only black guy!" and tells him, “I'm putting my underwear back on...that’s a no no...come take them off.”
• To Grubbs: In response to her telling him she bought a friend a present, “What kind of present your naked body.”
• To Grubbs: “Quiet and secretively we will always be together,” and later, “When was the last time you got laid.”
• To Grubbs: “Send me something very naughty.”

(More Tiger Woods stories.)