Jen Man-Shopped in Mayer Lull

It's time to rethink your career choices—and love life

(NEWSER) - Bounty Hunter is well on its way to being a flop, just like Jennifer Aniston’s last two romantic comedies (Management, sigh)—which means it's probably time for a new career direction. “She's aged out, no matter the yoga and the highlights. She just can't do America's sweetheart next door. She needs a big wake-up call,” one film critic tells the New York Post . More»

Singer offers questionable advice to Tiger Woods, too

(NEWSER) - If there’s one thing John Mayer can be counted on for, it’s fun quotes about masturbation. Yes, he’s back—and discussing Jennifer Aniston, Jessica Simpson, even Tiger Woods—in a Rolling Stone article previewed by PopEater . Some of the better, not-appropriate-for-children, quotes:

• What he wants in a life partner: “The Joshua Tree of vaginas.”
• What he wants right now: “All I want to do now is fuck the girls I’ve already fucked, because I can’t fathom explaining myself to somebody who can’t believe I’d be interested in them.”
• On his sexuality: “I’ve never slept with a man. But I get it. I’ve seen pictures of men on the Internet that are sexier than pictures of most women.”

Aniston, Mayer finally make our dreams come true. Plus: baby news, of course!

(NEWSER) - Jennifer Aniston’s desire for a baby and/or a boyfriend always sells magazines—so why not both? OK! reports the unlucky-in-love Aniston is back together with ex John Mayer after months of hooking up—although the story also claims she snagged Mayer again by playing hard to get. As if that’s not enough great news right there, Aniston is apparently planning to finally have a baby—no word on whether Mayer is also involved in that situation. More»

Finally, newly hot star spotted with someone other than Jennifer Aniston

(NEWSER) - Bradley Cooper may finally be able to stop fielding questions about Jennifer Aniston now that he's been spotted with someone else: Renée Zellweger. The co-stars of the upcoming Case 39 did a lot of gazing and flirting on a date Tuesday night in New York, the Daily News reports. Zellweger repeatedly told the star of The Hangover, “You are so funny!” and gushed to a fellow patron, “He’s sweet, really sweet!” More»

Plus, another ex pines over Jen, and more

(NEWSER) - Lindsay Lohan can’t catch a break. First she’s dumped, then her house is broken into—or not. The attempted burglary reported yesterday turned out to be a false alarm, the AP reports. Police said the house was just extremely messy, not ransacked. Elsewhere:

• Jennifer Aniston’s exes are falling all over her. First it was Brad Pitt, now John Mayer, reports the Daily Mail. Mayer’s post-Aniston ex told Heat magazine, “He's been playing guitar alone at night, pining over her.”