Look Out, London— Paris Is Coming

Some, like Speidi and Paris Hilton, are just so obvious

(NEWSER) - Some celebrities should probably never be allowed around a child—let alone allowed to have one of their own. “That means you, Heidi and Spencer,” writes Jen Genova on Babble . The 9 other power couples who should really, really not add to their family units:

1. No matter how adorably in love Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher are, it's still creepy "that his step-daughters had major crushes on him."
2. Dear Christopher Knight and Adrianne Curry: "We have about oh, zero interest in tuning into a show called My Fair Brady and Baby."

Kardashian and West are still apparently publicizing each other

(NEWSER) - The Kim Kardashian-Kanye West publicity stunt —er, relationship—lives on: A jealous Kim has now banned all other women from hanging around her man. "Kim is incredibly protective of Kanye and doesn’t want any women near him unless she is there—even his friends," a source tells the Sun . Rihanna, who has joined Kanye and Jay-Z on stage, "wasn’t even allowed to go into his dressing room without Kim being there." But perhaps Kim needn't worry: The New York Daily News reports that Kanye blew off a planned performance at Cannes last week to have dinner with Kim, and adds that Rihanna is dating New York Knick JR Smith anyway. More»

Paris Hilton? 'A drunken prude'

(NEWSER) - Just because someone is rich and famous does not, apparently, guarantee he or she is also good in the sack. The Frisky lists 10 celebrities who've gotten less than fantastic reviews from their former partners:

• Eminem: "He's not very well endowed," Kim Mathers once said. "If you're going to have sex with Marshall, make sure you have a little blue pill, because otherwise it does not work."
• Maria Sharapova: Adam Levine denies it, but he once reportedly said he was "disappointed" because he thought she would "be the loud screaming type."

Actor spots young runner keel over in Hyde Park

(NEWSER) - Dustin Hoffman has joined the ranks of celebs who save lives. He was walking in London's Hyde Park when he spotted a jogger first stagger, then keel over, frothing at the mouth. He immediately called the emergency Brit number—999—and stayed as paramedics performed CPR on Sam Dempster, 27. As paramedics hoisted the revived runner into an ambulance, Hoffman told them: "Great job, guys," reports the Sun . Dempster, who's on the mend, says he has "no memory of what happened. The paramedics told me. It’s unbelievable. I want to say ‘Thank you’ to Dustin Hoffman. He saved my life." More»

Or maybe not? After all, Beyonce does her own makeup

(NEWSER) - What with her $5,200 baby tub , her Swarovski crystal-studded high chair , and her sterling silver Tiffany hair brush , among other things , we all know Blue Ivy Carter is going to grow up to be a terror. Fortunately, Jay-Z knows it too, E! reports. “Everyone imagines they'll be a great dad,” he said last night on Oprah’s Master Class. “I imagine I'll take things I learned from my mom and things I've learned from raising my nephews and apply that.” Even so, “at the end of the day, I just know I'll probably have the worst, spoiled little kid ever." More»