Penn's New Role? Mr. Mom

Once reality royalty, now they're forced to eat 'tacos and burritos'

(NEWSER) - The famewhoring and ridiculous antics of Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag finally backfired, leaving them broke and forced to live rent-free at Spencer's parents' house. (Although, it is a Santa Barbara beach house, so don't feel too sorry for them.) They explain to the Daily Beast how it all went wrong:

• They thought that living a fake life in front of the cameras (for example: Through it all, they never actually broke up ) would pay off for them in the long run, but it turns out "you can be too famous," Spencer says. "Reality TV is not a career." His antics for the camera made him so widely detested he can't find a job, and is considering going back to school. Heidi has been appearing on a reality competition show.
• Spencer says they never truly had any money, because they spent it as quickly as they got it. A whopping $2 million went toward hiring writers, producers, and engineers for Heidi's failed music endeavor .
• "I probably spent a million dollars on suits and fancy clothes,” Spencer says. “My whole million-dollar wardrobe—I would never wear that again. They’re props. Everything we were doing, we were buying props."

Plus, Jon and Kate actually in the same place at the same time, more

(NEWSER) - Tinseltown is abuzz with speculation about what caused Sean Penn’s acting hiatus, the New York Post reports. Some say Natalie Portman, who was seen with Penn in the middle of his separation drama, broke his heart. Elsewhere:

• Jon and Kate Gosselin were actually spotted together—imagine that! The drama-ridden reality couple played with their kids outside their Pennsylvania home, Us reports, but didn’t show any affection toward each other.

Who says 'reality TV' isn't a serious addiction?

(NEWSER) - Bad news for bad TV addicts: Celebrity Rehab 4 is on hold until VH1 finds a big-name patient. Well, if the show agrees not to be picky about what exactly they're addicted to, Amelia McDonell-Parry of The Frisky has a few ideas:

• Spencer Pratt: "Spencer has been a certified douchebag for years, but ever since he started wearing pounds of supposedly 'magic' crystals around his neck, fingers, and in his pockets, he’s gone off the deep end."
• Tila Tequila: OK, OK, so she's already set to appear on the show for her Ambien addiction. But shouldn't we be more concerned about her Twitter addiction?

Actor opens up about his work in Haiti

(NEWSER) - For the past five months—with only brief breaks for fundraising, testifying on Capitol Hill, and of course attending the Oscars—Sean Penn has lived in a tent camp in Haiti. Douglas Brinkley, who volunteered with Penn in New Orleans after Hurricane Katrina, talks to him about his experience for Vanity Fair :

• On Robin Wright: “She is a ghost to me now.”

What letter will her breasts be now? Z?

(NEWSER) - Heidi Montag is already so top-heavy she appears ready to topple over, but that isn’t stopping her from planning plastic surgery No. 14. After waking up from her last round of robotic—er, surgical—enhancements, she was so angry that her breasts weren’t bigger, “she wanted to punch the doctor in the face,” stalwart hubby Spencer Pratt tells Life & Style. More»