For Pro Athletes, Retirement Is a Nightmare

(NEWSER) - With Brett Favre mulling yet another unretirement, Will Leitch of New York magazine looks back on the worst unretirements in sports history. They range from cringe-worthy to incomparably cringe-worthy:

• Ricky Williams: How many drug tests can one man fail?
• Lance Armstrong: "It’s difficult to come up with a better final chapter than winning your seventh Tour after overcoming cancer and thoroughly infuriating the French by evading all their attempts to bust you as a drug cheat."

Retirement moved up because of mother's failing health

(NEWSER) - Chicago Cubs manager Lou Piniella will end his 46-year career in baseball after today’s game. Piniella originally planned to retire at the end of the season, but announced today he must leave early to take care of his ill mother, the Chicago Sun-Times reports. “It’s not fair to the team, the players,” he said. “I didn’t think my career would end this way, but my mom needs me home. I’ve enjoyed it here. I’ve had four wonderful years.” More»

Football players leave much to be desired as Christian role models

(NEWSER) - Christian evangelicals must be pretty amped up by the high profile of their religion in professional sports, David Gibson writes, but the "cozy coupling" of church and sport has its dark side. First, there’s what commentator Shirl James Hoffman recently called the “cheap grace” of athletic faith. Take the Saints’ locker room talk of their Super Bowl win being God's plan: Didn’t they stop to think He was more concerned with earthquake-ravaged Haiti than their “gridiron performance?” More»

Lefty pitcher calls it a day after reaching 300 wins

(AP) - After 22 major league seasons, The Big Unit is walking away from baseball, ending one of the greatest pitching careers in baseball history. The 6-foot-10 Johnson announced his retirement on a conference call late yesterday, a decision that had been expected from the overpowering left-hander who reached 300 wins last June. "I really wanted to go out on my terms," Johnson said. "I just feel like there's not a lot more for me to do in this game." More»

Pacman Jones' strip club behavior typifies the sad new culture

(NEWSER) - American sports culture descended into sheer decadence this decade, and no single incident sums it better than Pacman Jones' "making it rain" with cash in a Vegas strip club in 2007, writes Clay Travis for Fanhouse. The chaos that ensued after he tossed around the money—reportedly about $100,000—left a bouncer shot outside the club. Click here for Travis' full list of the decade's 10 worst examples of athletes' excess. More»