Sheen Gives Erratic Interview Star says he's ready to return to sitcom ... and some other stuff By Rob Quinn, Newser Staff Posted Feb 15, 2011 4:29 AM CST 8 comments Comments This Jan. 28, 2009 file photo shows Charlie Sheen in Los Angeles. (AP Photo/Chris Pizzello, File) (Newser) – Charlie Sheen said he's ready to get back to work on Two and a Half Men—and compared himself to an 80-year-old Demi Moore—in an interview with the Dan Patrick Show yesterday that the LA Times called "highly erratic." Among his rambling comments: There's clearly no love lost between Sheen and his bosses. The actor—currently undergoing rehab at home—says studio execs are standing in the way of him returning to the show. He says he went to the hit sitcom's set and was "banging on the stage door" but no one would let him in. So when is Sheen officially scheduled to return to the show? He quipped, "I believe August of 2014 at this pace," then said "I don't know; it's supposed to be like the 28th." As for those comments he made to the UCLA baseball team about staying off crack and drinking chocolate milk: "It just came out of me like poetry." Plus, staying off crack is "pretty good advice, unless you can manage it socially." Patrick then asked Sheen if he thought he could handle crack socially: "Yeah, yeah, but that kind of blew up in my face. Like an exploding crack pipe." On whether or not his contract has a morality clause: "I haven't read it. I don't think it covers 'let me totally dominate and interfere with your personal life.'" Describing his raspy voice: "I sound like Demi Moore in her 80s." Click for more on Charlie Sheen.