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Dear Weiners Everywhere: It Gets Better

Someone else with the last name Weiner tries to cheer Anthony up

By Kevin Spak,  Newser Staff

Posted Jun 2, 2011 11:05 AM CDT | Updated Jun 2, 2011 1:51 PM CDT

(Newser) – It ain’t easy having the last name Weiner. That’s a point Anthony Weiner has made repeatedly in recent days, saying his name had obviously inspired the prankster who sent that infamous twitter photo. “I don’t know whether that photo has anything to do with your genitals—and actually, you don’t really seem to know either,” writes Juli Weiner in an open letter to the congressman in Vanity Fair. But “your honesty and openness has not gone ignored by other Weiners.”

Weiner—Juli, that is—knows the inevitable indignities that come every time your name is said, from grade school roll calls all the way through adulthood. “As someone who went through the vast majority of high school without publicly crying, I want you to know something, Anthony: it gets better.” After the puns have “reached their cruelest heights … everyone will eventually become desensitized, which is in no way intended to be a sex joke.”

Actor Ben Affleck, left, talks with Rep. Anthony Weiner, D-NY, while Affleck waits to testify before the House Foreign Affairs, Africa, Global Health, and Human Rights Subcommittee in this file photo.
Actor Ben Affleck, left, talks with Rep. Anthony Weiner, D-NY, while Affleck waits to testify before the House Foreign Affairs, Africa, Global Health, and Human Rights Subcommittee in this file photo.   (AP Photo/Cliff Owen)
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Sometimes you might
feel overwhelmed by irrecoverable rage at the Ellis Island customs agent whose brilliant idea it was to change ‘Vienskisztein’ or ‘Wienitezicz’ or whatever to ‘Weiner.’ - Juli Weiner

And in the darkest depths of your shame, you might have even declined to correct someone who pronounces it ‘WHINE-er.’ - Juli Weiner

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COMMENTS
Showing 3 of 9 comments
billcrawford
Jun 2, 2011 7:52 PM CDT
Change your last name and be done with it.
thepita
Jun 2, 2011 5:49 PM CDT
Having the first name Anita, I'm really glad I'm not a Weiner. Although, that'd be great for free drinks
LoginsSuck
Jun 2, 2011 3:59 PM CDT
I told you in the beginning I am weak when it comes to comedy. I love the weiner stories. I can't get enough good weiner.
 

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