Thanks to 50 Shades, the Classics Get Sex Scenes
Introducing 'Clandestine Classics'
By Evann Gastaldo, Newser Staff
Posted Jul 19, 2012 11:39 AM CDT
Updated Jul 22, 2012 2:30 PM CDT
The cover of the Clandestine Classics version of "Jane Eyre."   (http://clandestineclassics.blogspot.com/)

(Newser) Jane Eyre is great and all, but wouldn't it be so much better if it featured tons of "explosive sex" scenes? Thanks to Clandestine Classics, it soon will. The company is publishing erotic versions of that and other tomes including Pride and Prejudice, 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea, and even Sherlock Holmes stories. It's all thanks to the smash success of 50 Shades of Grey, according to the Hollywood Reporter. The founder of Clandestine's parent company observes, "People are going to either love it or hate it. But we're 100% convinced that there's a market there."

She also assures the Independent that the original prose and "the author's voice" will remain intact, but the novels will be "enhanced" by the addition of sex scenes. (Think "bondage sessions" between Catherine Earnshaw and Heathcliff in Wuthering Heights, or a homosexual tryst between Sherlock and Dr. Watson.) A sample line from Pride and Prejudice involves Elizabeth begging Mr. Darcy, "Please take me. I need it. I ache for it." Another scene describes Darcy as "hot, spicy, and all man." If that sounds appealing to you, look for the e-books starting July 30.

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Comments
Showing 3 of 21 comments
winterfairy
Jul 22, 2012 11:26 PM CDT
USA continues slouching toward Gomorrah.
secondalto
Jul 22, 2012 5:44 PM CDT
According to David Letterman, one of the suggested titles is, "David Cop-a-Feel". :D All joking aside, I think this is a horrendous idea.
Non-deep-thinker
Jul 22, 2012 4:22 PM CDT
Coming soon: Moby Dick.