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Sorry, Boys: The Thong Is Dead

Yes, that most uncomfortable undergarment is finally out

By Evann Gastaldo,  Newser Staff

Posted Jan 29, 2010 11:29 AM CST

(Newser) – The G-string has finally, truly peaked—and the end of the intrusive undergarment's reign merited a spread declaring the death of the thong in that bible of women’s magazines, Cosmopolitan. “The glory days of that skimpy, silky triangle of fabric—coveted by exhibitionists, praised by poets (well, Sisqo anyway)—has come to an end,” writes Sarah Hepola for Salon. “RIP, the thong. That thong-thuh-thong-thong-thong.”

Though the thong was ostensibly a women’s undergarment, the people truly affected by its demise are, of course, straight men. Hepola found some predictable responses, from “I love women’s asses” to “Women should wear as little as possible.” Other men, however, were just as disillusioned with the endless parade of Britney Spears “whale tails” and paparazzi upskirt shots as many women are. Thongs are, after all, “nearly as subtle as a dick in a jar.”

Models walk down the runway in underwear during the Exposed show at the Melbourne Fashion Festival March 21, 2002 at the Regent Plaza Ballroom in Melbourne, Australia.
Models walk down the runway in underwear during the Exposed show at the Melbourne Fashion Festival March 21, 2002 at the Regent Plaza Ballroom in Melbourne, Australia.   (Getty Images)
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Sisqo's immortal contribution to the world of music videos: "The Thong Song."   (TheMixInc)

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It's hard to think of an item in Victoria's closet that screams 'male gaze' quite so loudly (sequined pasties?). - Sarah Hepola

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COMMENTS
Showing 3 of 43 comments
Rocket448
Jan 31, 2010 7:08 AM CST
Clean-to-dirty. Pass it on.
divetrader
Jan 31, 2010 4:13 AM CST
My suggestion would be the invisible panties.
lela
Jan 31, 2010 1:36 AM CST
they can pry my thongs from my cold dead hands (or ass cheeks in this case)..... ;)))

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