10 Careers for Eliot Spitzer
You know, just in case CNN gig falls through
By Evann Gastaldo,  Newser Staff
Posted May 21, 2010 11:22 AM CDT
Former New York Gov. Eliot Spitzer addresses an audience during a Harvard University ethics forum on the school's campus in Cambridge, Mass., Thursday, Nov. 12, 2009.   (AP Photo/Steven Senne)

(Newser) – Eliot Spitzer is rumored to be a possible replacement for Campbell Brown on CNN, and in case he doesn’t get that job, Olivia Allin of The Frisky suggests 10 alternatives:

  • Britney Spears’ assistant: “The logic here would be that since he’s apparently attracted to sexual young women, Britney could scare him off of that addiction”—and he could help her regain control of her life in the process.
  • Unpaid prostitute: “Wouldn’t it be cool if Spitzer were forced to sleep with people he wasn’t attracted to?”

  • OxiClean spokesperson: It would take some time for him to become as universally beloved as Billy Mays, but he could try.
  • Child prostitute opponent: “I know, I know, is it really a good idea to introduce Spitzer to more women of the night?” Allin writes—but she still thinks he could do some good.
  • Manservant: To make things up to wife Silda, Spitzer could spend his time “showering her with gifts, bringing her breakfast in bed, giving her daily massages, and working on their sex life.”
For the complete list—which includes a couple of serious options—click here.