dumb criminals

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Woman Busts Naked Intruder in Tub, Munching Her Cheetos

Evelyn Washington charged before she could finish her snack

(Newser) - Police in Louisiana say a woman came home to discover a naked stranger in her tub, eating her Cheetos while taking a bath, reports the AP . A Monroe police affidavit says 29-year-old Evelyn Washington was arrested on burglary and property damage charges. The Fort Worth Star-Telegram reports that Washington was... More »

Cops: Alleged Car Thief Drives Stolen Car to Court

And voila, new charges

(Newser) - Bad habits: Police say a man answering to a stolen-car charge drove a stolen car to court in Connecticut. Authorities say 25-year-old Jonathan Rivera was at Hartford Superior Court on Wednesday to appear before a judge on a charge of first-degree larceny and tampering with a motor vehicle from February.... More »

Lucky Lotto Ticket Not So Lucky for This Florida Clerk

She allegedly gave undercover agent just $5 as his winnings, kept winning ticket for herself

(Newser) - A lucky lottery ticket turned out to be not so lucky for a Florida store clerk, who's accused of stealing it from a "customer." The reason "customer" is in quotes is because, per the Miami Herald , he was actually an undercover agent for the Florida Lottery... More »

Cops: Suspect Took Cab Away From Bank Robbery

'Getaway driver' called police after seeing photo

(Newser) - Police in West Virginia say a suspected bank robber was captured after taking a cab to the heist. Ryan Michael Stepanian was arrested in Monday's robbery of a Charles Town bank and another bank heist Friday in nearby Ranson, the AP reports. Cab driver George Lyon says he took... More »

Cops: Doughnut-Eating Champ Robbed Doughnut Store

NC man was arrested after winning 2014 contest

(Newser) - Doughnuts and arrests appear to be inextricably linked in the life of North Carolina man Bradley Hardison. The 27-year-old—who was arrested in 2014 after he won the doughnut-eating contest at the Elizabeth City Police Department's National Night Out Against Crime event, helping officers who'd been seeking him... More »

When Driving Getaway Car, Be Sure to Do it on a Full Tank

Georgia men made it 2 miles down the road after alleged robbery, ran out of gas

(Newser) - Police say a getaway car ran out of gas after an armed robbery near Atlanta, leading to the speedy arrest of two suspects. Gwinnett County police Cpl. Michele Pihera says 18-year-old Najee Logan and 21-year-old Justin Larry were charged with armed robbery after their arrest early Tuesday after officers found... More »

Why You Don't Bring Cocaine to Your Court Hearing

Juan Jose Vidrio Bibriesca's cocaine fell when he took his hat off

(Newser) - Authorities say a man who was in a Colorado court for violating his bond on a drug charge is in even more trouble after a wad of cocaine fell from his hat while he was in front of the judge. The Vail Daily reported Wednesday that 43-year-old Juan Jose Vidrio... More »

'Idiots of the Century' Swim Into Croc Trap

Australian authorities are 'gobsmacked'

(Newser) - Authorities in Australia say they're "gobsmacked" by the sheer stupidity of a group of men seen swimming to a crocodile trap in Queensland—and getting inside with the bait. The men were spotted getting into the mouth of the trap at the Port Douglas marina, close to where... More »

Suspect Hiding From Cops Calls 911 for Rescue

Utah man locked himself in church boiler room

(Newser) - A Utah man who was hiding from police and fled arrest had to call 911 to be rescued after getting stuck in his hiding spot. Salt Lake City police say 46-year-old Shane Paul Owen called dispatchers for help on Tuesday, more than six hours after he accidentally locked himself in... More »

Cops: Unpaid Waffle House Bill Exposed ID Theft Ring

Suspects skipped out on $7 bill

(Newser) - Police in Louisiana have uncovered a sophisticated, Los Angeles-based identity theft ring, thanks to two men who skipped out on their $7 Waffle House bill, authorities say. Waffle House employees called police Saturday, saying two men had stiffed the restaurant and driven away in a U-Haul van. Investigators were still... More »

Women Escape Jail, Get Arrested at Escape Game

2nd escape in 24 hours proved impossible when cops showed up

(Newser) - Two women who escaped from jail in Alberta, Canada, were apparently so confident in their abilities that they headed to an escape room less than 24 hours later. Another escape proved impossible, however, when police officers surprised them within minutes. The scene unfolded Tuesday at SideQuests Adventures in Edmonton, which... More »

Suspect in Gas Station Robbery Forgot One Important Item

Sean Harris busted after running out of gas on an Indiana highway

(Newser) - Authorities say an Indiana man who robbed a gas station made off with food, drinks, and cigarettes. What he didn't steal was gas, the AP notes. The Northwest Indiana Times reports that a state trooper arrested 33-year-old Sean Harris on Wednesday after finding him stranded by the side of... More »

Thieves Steal Trailer, Get Grim Surprise

Cops recovered trailer with body inside

(Newser) - A grim surprise may have been enough to make some New Mexico crooks give up stealing: A U-Haul trailer with a body inside was stolen from outside a Residence Inn in Albuquerque late Sunday night or early Monday morning, KOAT reports. Police say the thieves made off with both an... More »

Self-Described Drug Dealer Calls 911, Reports Stolen Drugs

David Blackmon is charged with possession of cocaine

(Newser) - Calling 911 to report a stolen bag of cocaine probably wasn't the best idea for a self-described Florida drug dealer. But Okaloosa Sheriff's officials wrote on Facebook that 32-year-old David Blackmon did just that on Sunday morning. The post says Blackmon called 911 to report a robbery in... More »

'We Went Down All the Slides': Alleged Snapchat Confession

Teens busted for early-morning break-in at SC water park: cops

(Newser) - Two teens in Myrtle Beach, SC, have apparently never heard the phrase "What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas"—though in this case, Vegas is "the water park." Logan Brooke Larrimore and Farren Marie Lane, both 18, were arrested and charged Wednesday with third-degree burglary after... More »

Theft of GPS Tracking Devices Backfires Spectacularly

Burglar's attempt to steal a beer also went wrong

(Newser) - It's only June, but a crook in California may already have a lock on the Dumbest Criminal of 2017 award. Authorities had little trouble tracking the thief down after he stole 100 GPS trackers along with other items from the Santa Clara offices of tech firm Roambee, NBC4 reports.... More »

NH Cops Aren't Buying This Guy's Pot Excuse

Selket Taylor told police who busted him that he 'only smokes in Mass.'

(Newser) - A New Hampshire police department has issued a public service announcement with an odd mug shot after a man was arrested with marijuana in his car. Hampstead police said in a release Monday, "as a public service announcement—it is illegal to possess recreational marijuana in New Hampshire, even... More »

Judge to Defendant: No, You Can't Juggle at Trial

'The keystone to his defense is: He's literally a clown'

(Newser) - A Massachusetts judge has denied a man's request to juggle during his trial to show jurors he was just clowning around when he allegedly tried to rob a convenience store. "The keystone to his defense is: He's literally a clown," Orlando Melendez wrote of himself in... More »

Man Accidentally Reveals $500M Opium Crop to Cops

'Unbelievable'

(Newser) - Authorities say they visited a North Carolina home this week after receiving a tip about a crime, but the crime they found wasn't the one resident Cody Xiong allegedly divulged. After a tip came into police last week—possibly related to a cockfighting operation, per the Charlotte Observer —... More »

Note to iPhone Thieves: Do Not Answer FaceTime Calls

Deputy called stolen phone, alleged perp answered, got his picture taken

(Newser) - The latest gleeful Facebook post from law enforcement comes to us by way of, why yes, Florida: Specifically, the Okaloosa County Sheriff's Office, which titled its post , "Smile - Thanks to a Quick Thinking OCSO Deputy - You're Being Facetimed Using a Stolen Phone!" Which brings... More »

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