It's going to be tough for anyone in Tanana, Alaska, to read this story because the Internet's been out since New Year's Eve. It seems revelers fired their shotguns into the air in celebration and took out a fiber-optic cable line, reports the Fairbanks Daily News-Miner. The village is about 150 miles west of Fairbanks, and the local provider is still waiting for replacement parts to arrive because, Alaska. "You can't fix stupid," says the company's owner. Still, it's nowhere near as brilliant as the woman digging for scrap metal who took down the Internet in not one but two countries a while back.