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FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 27, 2009
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 OPINION 
3

No, Seriously, Federer May Be a Robot

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(Newser) – The late David Foster Wallace once marveled at a Roger Federer forehand, saying, “It was impossible. It was like something out of The Matrix.” And now that Federer has passed Pete Sampras and holds the Grand Slam record, it’s time to wonder if Wallace was on to something. “Let me put this bluntly,” writes Roger Cohen of the New York Times. “Is Roger Federer part of a Matrix-like artificial reality or is he flesh and blood?”

During the Wimbledon final, Federer’s shirt remained buttoned for the entire match. No sweat appeared on his forehead. He seemed to be “switching from slice to topspin backhand on the basis of some nerd’s formula no opponent can grasp.” OK, so Federer broke down at the Australian Open. We’ve seen him cry and throw a racket. He’s probably human. “Unless, of course, all this is only further proof of the devious genius of Federer’s cyber-creators.”

Andy Roddick of U.S. plays a return to Roger Federer of Switzerland during their men's final match on the Centre Court at Wimbledon, Sunday, July 5, 2009.
Andy Roddick of U.S. plays a return to Roger Federer of Switzerland during their men's final match on the Centre Court at Wimbledon, Sunday, July 5, 2009.   (AP Photo/Anja Niedringhaus)
Roger Federer of Switzerland acknowledge the crowd after defeating Andy Roddick of U.S. in the men's final match on the Centre Court at Wimbledon, Sunday, July 5, 2009.
Roger Federer of Switzerland acknowledge the crowd after defeating Andy Roddick of U.S. in the men's final match on the Centre Court at Wimbledon, Sunday, July 5, 2009.   (AP Photo/Julian Finney, pool)
Roger Federer of Switzerland pose with the trophy after defeating Andy Roddick of U.S. in their men's final match on the Centre Court at Wimbledon, Sunday, July 5, 2009.
Roger Federer of Switzerland pose with the trophy after defeating Andy Roddick of U.S. in their men's final match on the Centre Court at Wimbledon, Sunday, July 5, 2009.   (AP Photo/Julian Finney, pool)
People walk past a picture of Wimbledon champion Roger Federer that decorates the front of a shop in central London's Oxford Street, Tuesday, July 7, 2009.
People walk past a picture of Wimbledon champion Roger Federer that decorates the front of a shop in central London's Oxford Street, Tuesday, July 7, 2009.   (AP Photo/Lefteris Pitarakis)
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I wanted Roddick to win because he may never play that well again while Federer will seldom play much less well. I wanted Roddick to win because he broke a sweat. - Roger Cohen

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3 comments
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Nwambe
Jul 9, 09 9:53 AM CDT
This is the stupidest fucking thing I've ever read on Newser. Reply
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Zorro
Jul 9, 09 10:12 AM CDT
I thought that was hilarious. Reply
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Parvus
Jul 9, 09 11:27 PM CDT
how does this make it to the newser grid? if you can't resist the urge to praise federer, make it worth our while and say something interesting about his extraordinary capabilities to, say, predict the trajectory of a ball based on the movements of the player right before he hits it --or something of that nature. don't pick the most ridiculous article you can find and quote it as if it were newsworthy or even an intelligent footnote to the ongoing glorification of mr. federer. Reply
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