Cash-Strapped Adults Back Home With Prickly Parents

Experts advise on how to avoid resentment when kids have to return to the nest
By Rob Quinn,  Newser Staff
Posted May 14, 2009 7:41 AM CDT
An AARP survey found that 11% of Americans aged between 35 and 44 live with their parents, and the proportion is growing as the economy worsens.   (Shutter Stock)
camera-icon View 1 more image

(Newser) – Tempers are fraying in households across America as tough times force a growing number of adults to move back in with their parents, the New York Times reports. The move is difficult for both sides, experts say, as the offspring chafe at new restrictions and struggle with feelings of failure, while the parents often resent having a less tranquil retirement than they'd bargained for.

Therapists say the situation can be a happy one rather than a stressful one if both sides can adjust. They advise parents to cut back on the parenting, to discuss expectations before the adults move back in, and to avoid "over-helping." Adults, meanwhile, are advised to keep a positive attitude and to treat the relationship as a roommates one rather than a step back in time—but not to forget whose house it is.