An unfortunate wrong turn and an elderly man charged with helping the hungry are among the weirdest crime stories of the week:
- Guy Uses Unusual Mode of Transportation to Get to Local Bar: Police in Western Australia say a man decided to stop for a beer at a pub after making a major purchase: a two-seater Beechcraft airplane, which was also the vehicle the man chose to drive to the Purple Pub for his celebratory beverage. There were a couple of reasons why this turned out not to be a great idea.
- Alleged Drug Smuggler Parks in Wrong Lot: You just had one job, suspected drug smuggler: to get across the US-Mexico border with 27 pounds of meth. And technically a California woman did just that, making it through the first checkpoint into the US free and clear and without arousing any suspicion—until she made a wrong turn and ended up in a parking lot she shouldn't have been in.
- Florida Is Now Arresting Elderly Men for Feeding the Homeless: "Drop that plate right now" was the command hurled at 90-year-old Arnold Abbott before he was charged with violating Florida law. His crime: feeding Fort Lauderdale's homeless. Two pastors were also cited with Abbott for disobeying a new city ordinance that effectively bans public food sharing. The mayor of Fort Lauderdale says that feeding the homeless "is not productive." Abbott, who's been helping out the hungry in his city for more than 20 years, has something else to say about it.
- Cops: Drunk IRS Worker Tried to Bribe Us: We've all been there: intoxicated, kicking back at a Steelers game after a long week toiling for the IRS, screaming and cursing, hurling steel crowd dividers around and knocking people unconscious. Oh, wait—you've never been there? Then you should probably read what not to say to police if you ever find yourself in such a situation.
- Why You Should Never Use Wife's Urine for Drug Test: A bus driver in Egypt provided his wife's urine to avoid drug testing his own. Officials asked him to confirm the urine was actually his (which he did), then told him the urine belonged to a woman who was two months' pregnant (a fact about his wife he apparently didn't know about beforehand). He's not the only one who tried to cheat a drug or alcohol test this week.
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