dumb criminals

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Cops: Bank Robber Made Deposit in ATM Outside

He was a Wells Fargo robber, and also a customer

(Newser) - Police in Delaware say a man who robbed a Wilmington bank on Saturday didn't keep the cash for long—after fleeing the Wells Fargo branch, he paused to make a deposit in the ATM outside. Police say McRoberts Williams, a 44-year-old California resident, handed a note to a teller...

Fake Hitman Website Fools Woman, Who Is Headed to Jail

Site's owner contacted Michigan police

(Newser) - A real woman tried to hire a hitman on a fake website. Wendy Lynn Wein, 52, found Rent-A-Hitman online and filled out a form asking for help killing her ex-husband. Unfortunately for Wein and perhaps fortunately for her ex, that site is owned not by a hitman but computer professional...

Man Steals Reporter's Phone, Has Face Seen by Millions

Egyptian man was arrested hours later

(Newser) - A Cairo-area reporter had his phone grabbed from his hands by a thief on a motorbike, but it wasn't exactly the perfect crime—the reporter had been livestreaming a broadcast at the time, and the thief's face was seen by millions. The Youm7 news site says its reporter,...

Woman Allegedly Made Bomb Threats to Get Boyfriend Off Work

Police say Kayla Blake told them she wanted to spend more time with him

(Newser) - A Maine woman who wanted to spend more time with her boyfriend came up with an incredibly stupid plan to get him off work, police say. Kayla Blake, 33, allegedly called in two bomb threats to her beau's workplace, the Portland Press Herald reports. Officials say the threats to...

Man Arrested After Breaking Into a Jail

California man said he was fleeing a man with a gun

(Newser) - Guards usually don’t have to watch for people breaking into a jail, so it’s maybe only a little surprising that they didn’t notice the man climbing over two fences then scrambling up to a second floor door. An alarm went off in the Maple Street Correctional Center...

Man Escapes Hotel Quarantine—for 8 Hours

A bed-sheet rope got him out

(Newser) - An Australian man ordered to spend the night in a quarantine hotel made a temporary escape early Tuesday down a rope made from bed sheets, which he dangled from his fourth-floor window, police said. The 39-year-old had arrived in Perth, Western Australia, from the Queensland capital of Brisbane on a...

'World's Unluckiest Burglars' Called Cops on Themselves

UK police say it was an easy arrest

(Newser) - Police in Britain say they received a "suspicious call" related to a burglary on Wednesday, one that came from the unsuspecting burglars themselves. Police say one of two men later arrested had butt-dialed 999, the emergency number in the UK, allowing authorities to listen in as the crime was...

Cops: Kohl's Theft Foiled by Dead Battery in Getaway Car

Whoops

(Newser) - Two apparent would-be thieves probably thought they had the perfect plan—one would run into their local Kohl's, grab a bunch of merch, and run back out to the parking lot, where the second guy would be waiting with the getaway car. What the suspects likely didn't count...

Cops to Suspect: You Forgot Your Winning Lottery Ticket

He was invited to pick it up at sheriff's office

(Newser) - A suspect in Georgia left his good luck behind when he abandoned a winning lottery ticket while fleeing sheriff's deputies.The Cherokee County Sheriff's Office says the man had a Georgia Lottery scratch game card worth $100 when he ran away during a traffic stop on Interstate 75...

He Had a Winning Scratch-Off. There Was One Problem

Police in Clearwater, Fla., say Herbert McClellan stole the lottery ticket before trying to cash it in

(Newser) - "So much for being lucky at the lottery." That's how the Clearwater Police Department in Florida is describing the unfortunate plight of 27-year-old Herbert McClellan, who's accused of swiping more than a dozen scratch-off lottery tickets from a local Speedway, then trying to cash in a...

Home-Printed Checks Scored Guy a Porsche, but No Rolexes
Cops: Guy 'Bought'
$140K Porsche With Check
From Home Computer
in case you missed it

Cops: Guy 'Bought' $140K Porsche With Check From Home Computer

Casey William Kelley also tried to scoop up 3 Rolex watches with another phony check, authorities say

(Newser) - Grand Theft Auto: Wewahitchka isn't a real thing, though a Florida man allegedly tried to make it one. Per the Northwest Florida Daily News , authorities in Walton County say Casey William Kelley purchased a Porsche 911 Turbo from a dealership in Destin on Monday for nearly $140,000. "...

DA: Typo on Man's Death Certificate Gave Away His Con

Long Island's Robert Berger is accused of faking his own death to get out of other charges

(Newser) - A Long Island criminal defendant tried faking his death to avoid a jail sentence, but the phony death certificate his lawyer submitted had a glaring spelling error that made it a dead giveaway for a fraud, prosecutors said Tuesday. Robert Berger, 25, of Huntington, New York, now faces up to...

Cops: Thief Left Behind Unexpected Clue

His young son, leading police in Germany to make an easy arrest

(Newser) - Police in Germany say they had an easy time tracking down a petty thief—he forgot his own son at the scene of the crime. Bautzen police said the 29-year-old suspect ran off when the $5.65 worth of goods he was trying to steal triggered an alarm at a...

Drug Dealer Learns Big Lesson on Where Not to Hide Bitcoin Codes

$60M now can't be accessed after Clifton Collins stashed codes in fishing rod case that's vanished

(Newser) - He should've stuck to his praise-winning honey. An Irish former beekeeper-turned-drug dealer is ruing the day he came up with the bright idea to stash the codes to accounts harboring close to $60 million in bitcoin in the aluminum cap of a fishing rod case—which, per the Guardian...

Inmate Climbed Into Ceiling. It Didn't End Well

Ohio inmate's prison escape plan foiled after ceiling gives way

(Newser) - WOIO calls it a botched prison escape in Ohio that ended in "embarrassing fashion." ABC7 calls it an "epic fail"—or should it be "epic fall"? It was all of these things for Jessica Boomershine, who was caught on surveillance camera determinedly trying...

Alleged Thief's Mistake: Using Daughter's Journal

Prosecutors say dropped item contained hit list, identifying information

(Newser) - Authorities in Tennessee say they busted a well-organized burglar after he allegedly dropped a notebook during a break-in that contained a list of other places he planned to target. Robert Shull Goddard, 49, is accused of smashing a glass door and breaking into a Nashville area home on Jan. 29,...

Why You Don't Hide Drugs in Bag Labeled 'Bag Full of Drugs'

'Our K-9’s can read,' Florida cops chortle

(Newser) - Two men charged with drug trafficking could have done a better job hiding their wares than using a package labeled "Bag Full of Drugs," Florida authorities say. Ian Simmons and Joshua Reinhardt, both 34, were pulled over in Santa Rosa County on Saturday after a trooper clocked them...

Wanted: This Guy, and 'No, We Are Not Kidding'

California thief made off with $500 from artist, but not his own caricature

(Newser) - A caricature out of California either shows the most confident thief ever, or a very stupid one. Police in Riverside are asking anyone who recognizes the caricature to reach out—"and no, we are not kidding"—after the man pictured robbed the artist of $500 in cash. The...

Cops Allegedly Confiscated His Pot. So He Called the Cops on Them

He was quite irate (and wrong) during his conversation with an Ohio police sergeant

(Newser) - A man confused about Ohio drug laws called a police department demanding that officers return the small amount of marijuana they "stole" from him, per the AP . WXIX reports the man told a Sharonville police dispatcher in an expletive-laced call Tuesday that it's legal to possess 100 grams...

Suspect Gives Up Hiding Spot With Ill-Timed Outburst

Missouri cops catch a lucky break thanks to a loud fart

(Newser) - A suspect in Missouri wanted for possession of a controlled substance is likely regretting recent food choices after loud farting revealed his or her hiding spot near Liberty, Fox News reports. "If you've got a felony warrant for your arrest, the cops are looking for you and you...

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