"Dumb, dumber, and dumbest." That’s how a waitress at Doc's Beach House in Bonita Beach, Fla., describes the three guys who broke in—clad only in their skivvies—in the wee hours Sunday and five minutes later made off with 60 hamburgers, 3 pounds of bacon, three red peppers, and, uh, a paddleboard. The beauty? They did it all, including divesting themselves of their underwear once inside, in front of security cameras; at one point they even spotted a camera and attempted to cover their naughty bits, according to South Florida’s News-Press. What they didn't do: Go anywhere near the cash register, though WFLA.com notes they might have swiped some shrimp, too.
Cops are still looking for the hungry burglars. Police have released a few of the tamer photos from the footage in the hopes that someone may recognize them, and the restaurant's GM says staffers who got an eyeful would love to do just that: "Everybody wants to work the night shift now," he jokes. Meanwhile, Doc's is taking matters into its own hands, posting on Facebook that "if you blacked out over the weekend and woke up with a case of tasty meats, please tag yourself in this photo." (Read more weird crimes stories.)