Cops: 'Genius' Drunk Guy Loses Keys, Swipes Forklift

Man 'needed something to drive,' took forklift because he knew 'how to drive one'
By Newser Editors and Wire Services
Posted Mar 12, 2017 8:07 AM CDT
This photo provided by Monroe County Sheriff’s Office shows Edward Quinton. Florida Keys authorities say Quinton stole a forklift and crashed into a gate, telling deputies he lost his car keys and needed...   (Uncredited)

(Newser) – Florida Keys authorities say a drunken man from Rhode Island stole a forklift and crashed into a gate in Marathon, telling deputies he lost his car keys and needed something to drive, reports the AP. The Monroe County Sheriff's Office says in a news release that 44-year-old Edward Quinton of Greenwich, RI, told deputies he was in the Keys helping friends move. Quinton was quoted as saying that after he lost his keys Thursday night, he needed a vehicle and took the forklift from a Marathon marina because he "knows how to drive one," per the Miami Herald. Quinton also told deputies he thought he could fix the damaged gate on account of him being "a genius." Breath tests showed Quinton's blood-alcohol level was twice Florida's legal limit. He faces drunk-driving, criminal mischief, burglary, and grand theft charges. Jail records listed no attorney for Quinton. (Read more dumb criminals stories.)

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