America: Laziest Country on Earth

Let the Olympics rate each country’s elite athletes; the Daily Beast wanted to know which country had the laziest general populace. So they pitted 24 developed nations against each other in four statistical categories: calories consumed per day, television viewing, Internet usage, and aversion to sports. The “winners”:

1. The United States of America: It’s not even close. America ranked first in calories per day and TV viewing, and earned bronze in the other two categories, a staggeringly dominant non-performance.

2. Canada: They play plenty of sports, but the guys up north spent an average 43 hours online in December, good for gold in that category.
3. Belgium: The country known for its chocolate, waffles, and beer ranked second in calories consumed.
4. Turkey: The Turks claim gold in sports aversion, and finish just out of medal range in Internet usage.
5. Great Britain: The British don’t play sports, either. Plus, one survey declared English men terrible lovers, because they’re “too lazy.”

(More laziness stories.)