Lindsey Graham Gets Quippy in GOP Undercard Debate

He's got jokes and jokes and jokes
By Michael Harthorne,  Newser Staff
Posted Oct 28, 2015 6:25 PM CDT
Lindsey Graham Gets Quippy in GOP Undercard Debate
Lindsey Graham speaks during the CNBC Republican presidential debate at the University of Colorado on Wednesday.   (AP Photo/Mark J. Terrill)

Wednesday's GOP undercard debate may not have as many viewers as the main event, but Lindsey Graham brought his A material anyway, launching quips at China, Bernie Sanders, and even himself. CNN reports some of his one-liners inspired only tepid laughter in the Colorado audience. And Maggie Haberman at the New York Times says Graham's jokes are all pre-canned and won't help him with voters. Regardless—on a night he was facing the similarly low-polling Rick Santorum, George Pataki, and Bobby Jindal—it was enough to get attention. Here are Graham's five best lines of the night.

  1. On Bernie Sanders: "The number two guy went to the Soviet Union on his honeymoon and I don't think he ever came back."
  2. On China: "When it comes to dealing with me, you've got a clenched fist and an open hand. You pick...Make me commander in chief and this crap stops."
  3. On beer: “If you’re looking for good beer policy, I’m your best bet. My dad owned a bar."
  4. On the University of Colorado: "Looking at their academic standards, the only way I could have gotten into this university is to be invited to this debate tonight."
  5. On the Democratic candidates: "If we don't beat these people, who the hell are we going to beat?"
(More Lindsey Graham stories.)

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