Questionable Choices: Apologies of the Week

The week's public apologies includes a reminder to all, but especially to celebrities, that public doughnut licking is never going to end well:

• A two-fer: "I feel like I could have expressed myself in a different way so here I am apologizing again. I was trying to get you to understand where I was coming from when I said what I said, but that's not important—I'd rather just apologize."—Singer Ariana Grande, who apologized not once, but twice, after getting caught on video licking doughnuts in a shop and saying she hated America. (She hates America's obesity, not America per se, as it turns out.)

• Yes, he really did that: "I would like to sincerely apologize to the Broadway community, all the other people in the audience that night, and most importantly the cast and crew of Hand to God."—Nick Silvestri, who delayed the start of a Broadway show by jumping on stage and plugging his phone charger into an outlet. (The outlet was just a prop anyway.)
• Damage control: "Paula immediately had this picture taken down as soon as she saw the post and apologizes to all who were offended."—Paula Deen spokesperson, after someone tweeted a photo of Deen and her son in costume, the latter in brownface.
• Not accepted: "I want to publicly apologize to one of the best owners in the @MCuban, the @DallasMavs and their fans."—NBA star DeAndre Jordan, after reneging on a verbal deal to sign with the Mavericks and going elsewhere. This one's made more interesting by the response of owner Mark Cuban: "When is an apology not an apology? When you didn't write it yourself."
• Out of work: "Once we saw this abhorrent video released @TheSun we took the decision to sack the individuals involved. We apologise for any offence."—HSBC's UK press office (hence the British spellings) after six workers thought it would be funny to make a mock ISIS execution video as a team-building exercise. Turns out, it wasn't funny.

(More apology stories.)