Cruise Just Cooler than Pitt

A Brad Pitt rep says the Inglourious Basterds star didn’t actually make fun of Tom Cruise’s Valkyrie, as one German magazine reported. But just in case he did, Joal Ryan of E! wants to you to know that Cruise is way cooler anyway. Why?

• Eye patches are interesting—mustaches not so much.
• Brooke Shields is cool. She's cool with Cruise. We have no idea where she stands on Pitt.

• Mr. & Mrs. Smith, Pitt’s movie with future lover Angelina Jolie, didn’t stick with you—or have the nudity—of Cruise and then-wife Nicole Kidman’s Eyes Wide Shut.
• In the early days of his fling with Jolie, Pitt kept her at arms length. In the early days of his fling with Katie Holmes, Cruise jumped on Oprah’s couch. Crazy at the time, cool in retrospect.
• Pitt’s totally showing off by building all those houses in New Orleans. Lamers.

(More Tom Cruise stories.)